Well fuck me sideways with a barge pole, I've only gone and got through to the regional finals of the live and unsigned completion!
To say I was surprised would have been the biggest understatement of the year!
I got to the competition and it was like a scene from fame, punked out by ashton kutcher. Kids and adults of all ages some rocking awesome tattoos, one with a sunflower tattoo and an awesome Mohawk and me.
I tell you I almost gave up and went home at that point. Sitting there surrounded by people playing guitar way better than I could ever dream of playing and guys singing melodies so beautiful that Ed Sheeran would have been sobbing into his shandy I thought "what the hell am I doing here?" I had no idea what I was going to sing, no idea if my guitar was still in tune or even if I'd remembered packing my capo. Just as I was about to stand up and go home the pretty ginger lady with the clipboard called my name and I sidled over sheepishly.
"hello" I said sounding like Martha from spaced. All efficient, she hustled me and two other guys through to some sort of holding pen where in some bizarre twist of new torture there was a tv screen where you could watch the acts performing on stage.
There were three girls on stage when I entered and all of them had such amazing voices that I would have turned and run then except the little guy who looked a but like a hamster was leading us up to wait by the side of the stage and then shoving us in front of our respective microphones.
Well, this is it I thought. May as well choose a song to sing. There and then, on the spot I chose the cup of tea song and let her rip.
Amazingly people were smiling and tapping along so it wasn't too bad but then the next two guys performed and I thought ah well, that's that then. They were amazing!
We got off stage and another guy with a clipboard said he'd come and find us if we got through and I seriously considered leaving then and there thinking there was no way I've gotten through but I took a seat cos ultimately I'm a good girl and have to do as I'm told. Clipboard guy came over ten minutes later and called my name and as he wasn't carrying any bits of paper I thought he had the thanks but no thanks speech all prepared but no! He said congratulations; you're through. I looked at him blankly for what seemed like hours as though he was talking to me in Japanese and before I knew it I was filling in my form and agreeing to come to the regional finals on the 22 April.
Well, that's pretty much the whole of the story but the ride has only just begun. I need people to come and support me at the regional finals, make banners, wear t shirts that kind of thing so if you love me at all in the slightest please come and show your support on the 22 April! Crikey!
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Friday, February 3, 2012
A piece about on line dating
This is a piece I wrote about online dating and published by Gallery magazine. Very exciting.
Rad my article! You know you want to
Very short blog post I know but the article is there. What more could you want?
Rad my article! You know you want to
Very short blog post I know but the article is there. What more could you want?
Friday, January 27, 2012
Raw food experience
Right toys have been picked up and put back in the pram and we're back on track to start trying to go raw again. I think the problem last time is my mental attitude was calling it a challenge which it is but that doesn't mean I have to accomplish it all in one go. After having a very informative couple of hours making actually quite tasty food with MT even if the combinations were a bit strange it's left me feeling much more positive about the whole thing and reduced some of the pressure I've put on myself to do it all in one go. Make the small changes and the big changes will follow. I'm not going to beat myself up of I have a piece of cheese or a beer but by the same token I'm trying not to go on carb or alcohol binges as well. The whole raw thing makes a lot of sense (spend a couple of hours with MT an you'll think so too) and actually even with the massive falling off the wagon thing yesterday I've actually lost 8lb which is not that much but again in the grand scheme of things if it makes me healthier it can't be all bad.
So, probably best not to dive head first into it but by making small changes i think we'll get there.
So, probably best not to dive head first into it but by making small changes i think we'll get there.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Raw food vegan challenge day 4
FUCK THE RAW FOOD!!
That's right I quit! When you start feeling headachey and nauseous that's one thing, but to start throwing up green shit that's quite another all together. I can still write the article from the perspective that I tried it and Mazza has stuck it out for a whole week (probably because she's even more stubborn than I am!) and I will still interview the vegan and learn some recipes but I think that's it for me.
On an unrelated note, why do estate agents have to be such dicks? Is it like a clause in the contract? If they apply for the job and aren't enough of a dick do they have to go to dick training school? Discuss.
That's right I quit! When you start feeling headachey and nauseous that's one thing, but to start throwing up green shit that's quite another all together. I can still write the article from the perspective that I tried it and Mazza has stuck it out for a whole week (probably because she's even more stubborn than I am!) and I will still interview the vegan and learn some recipes but I think that's it for me.
On an unrelated note, why do estate agents have to be such dicks? Is it like a clause in the contract? If they apply for the job and aren't enough of a dick do they have to go to dick training school? Discuss.
Raw food vegan challenge day 3
Today was the worst of all days. I overslept and had to grab a banana for breakfast then had to meet someone in a pub where they were serving food and all I could have was a cup of tea with no milk. Then the raw oatmeal recipe I followed was disgusting and had to be binned as it was inedible swill, I had a lunch of greens, curly kale, rocket, spinach, carrot batons and the red lentil hummous I made which was ok but not satisfying.
I've felt headachey and nauseous all day, the hunger comes on with such force each time that if I'm out in town I honestly feel like I'm going to vomit if I don't get any food and the depressing thought that while yea I can have an apple, it's not going to be as satisfying as having a meatball sub and won't fill me up for as long. Then the little voice inside my head says "oh go on, just have a little sandwich. No one will know" and it takes tremendous will power to shut that voice up and walk past KFC without murdering the next person who comes out of there with a bargain bucket.
I've felt headachey and nauseous all day, the hunger comes on with such force each time that if I'm out in town I honestly feel like I'm going to vomit if I don't get any food and the depressing thought that while yea I can have an apple, it's not going to be as satisfying as having a meatball sub and won't fill me up for as long. Then the little voice inside my head says "oh go on, just have a little sandwich. No one will know" and it takes tremendous will power to shut that voice up and walk past KFC without murdering the next person who comes out of there with a bargain bucket.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Raw food vegan challenge day 1 and 2
Day 1
I start the day with a banana, mango and blueberry smoothie which is actually no different to how I start most days so this is no biggie, it's only after I've been researching raw recipes online all morning and start to get hungry that I realise that I'm going to need a lot more preparation as I've not got anything for lunch or dinner unless I wish to snack on bananas all day. By the time I'm ready to go out into the world I'm already famished and have to snack on some cherries.
Once out I head to holland and Barrett where a spotty teenage boy regrets asking me if I need any help and recoils in horror when I tell him about my raw food challenge. After he's scuttled off to hide in the store room I browse the shelves unsure of what I'm actually allowed to have and whether I can get any of it cheaper in tescos.
I leave the shop having been signed up to the points card system and after purchasing a jar of vegan mayonnaise, some vegan mozzarella and some raw snack bars in a variety of flavours. Again I am so hungry that I crack open the cashew nut one and chow down before I've even pocketed my change. I'm a bit put off by the look and texture of it but it actually doesn't taste that bad.
I run round tescos trying to avoid eye contact with the cheese and trying to ignore the smell of freshly baked bread while I stock up on spinach and salad items and a bit of cous cous for good measure.
Now so hungry I'm actually growling at people, I pay for my shopping and run home to make myself a hearty salad before I kill someone.
The salad actually fills me up so I head to rehearsals for the evening feeling a little bit happier but this is short lived. About an hour into rehearsals the hunger returns in full force. I've found that you don't get slightly hungry first it just comes as a full throttle smack in the face hunger that descends with no warning. I drink some water to see if this helps. It doesn't.
I make someone take me home as the thought of getting two buses with this hunger is too much to bear and I console myself with a nice bowl of cherries. It's not the same as some toast and marmite and I go to bed hungry.
Day 2
Ok new day but still not feeling great about the whole thing. Doesn't help that Mazza is doing the challenge with me for the first seven days and her first diary entry is light and breezy as though she's going to swan through this no problem.
Again I start the day with a banana mango and blueberry smoothie but I put more mango and blueberries in this time. As I'm going out house hunting today I put another snack bar in my bag along with a tub of vegetables containing carrots, baby corn and mange tout drenched in balsamic vinegar as that's the only way to make them palatable when you're in a hurry. Once again when I tell my friend about the challenge he recoils in horror and tells me about the bacon sarnie he had for breakfast while I grind my teeth and stuff my face with carrot batons.
It's on the bus home that the hunger returns and I feel that if I eat another vegetable stick I'm going to kill someone so we have to get off the bus and go to tesco where I stock up on brazil nuts, a pot of pineapple chunks, some oats, honey and some innocent smoothies as I can't wait til I get home to have something, anything!
The smoothie abates my hunger somewhat but it's not satisfying at all. You know when you get hungry when you're out and about and you can deal with it because "it's ok, I'll have some nice hearty beef stew and dumplings when I get home" and you know you'll be satisfied until breakfast in the morning but this hunger is awful because you know that whatever you eat isn't going to fill you up for long and the hunger cycle is going to continue.
I go to the opening show and take my brazil nuts with me to snack on but it's just not the same unless they're covered in chocolate.
Get home to bed just as hungry and miserable. Read Mazzas second diary entry, think she's starting to crack too. The hunger will get you in the end and when do these cravings stop!!!
I start the day with a banana, mango and blueberry smoothie which is actually no different to how I start most days so this is no biggie, it's only after I've been researching raw recipes online all morning and start to get hungry that I realise that I'm going to need a lot more preparation as I've not got anything for lunch or dinner unless I wish to snack on bananas all day. By the time I'm ready to go out into the world I'm already famished and have to snack on some cherries.
Once out I head to holland and Barrett where a spotty teenage boy regrets asking me if I need any help and recoils in horror when I tell him about my raw food challenge. After he's scuttled off to hide in the store room I browse the shelves unsure of what I'm actually allowed to have and whether I can get any of it cheaper in tescos.
I leave the shop having been signed up to the points card system and after purchasing a jar of vegan mayonnaise, some vegan mozzarella and some raw snack bars in a variety of flavours. Again I am so hungry that I crack open the cashew nut one and chow down before I've even pocketed my change. I'm a bit put off by the look and texture of it but it actually doesn't taste that bad.
I run round tescos trying to avoid eye contact with the cheese and trying to ignore the smell of freshly baked bread while I stock up on spinach and salad items and a bit of cous cous for good measure.
Now so hungry I'm actually growling at people, I pay for my shopping and run home to make myself a hearty salad before I kill someone.
The salad actually fills me up so I head to rehearsals for the evening feeling a little bit happier but this is short lived. About an hour into rehearsals the hunger returns in full force. I've found that you don't get slightly hungry first it just comes as a full throttle smack in the face hunger that descends with no warning. I drink some water to see if this helps. It doesn't.
I make someone take me home as the thought of getting two buses with this hunger is too much to bear and I console myself with a nice bowl of cherries. It's not the same as some toast and marmite and I go to bed hungry.
Day 2
Ok new day but still not feeling great about the whole thing. Doesn't help that Mazza is doing the challenge with me for the first seven days and her first diary entry is light and breezy as though she's going to swan through this no problem.
Again I start the day with a banana mango and blueberry smoothie but I put more mango and blueberries in this time. As I'm going out house hunting today I put another snack bar in my bag along with a tub of vegetables containing carrots, baby corn and mange tout drenched in balsamic vinegar as that's the only way to make them palatable when you're in a hurry. Once again when I tell my friend about the challenge he recoils in horror and tells me about the bacon sarnie he had for breakfast while I grind my teeth and stuff my face with carrot batons.
It's on the bus home that the hunger returns and I feel that if I eat another vegetable stick I'm going to kill someone so we have to get off the bus and go to tesco where I stock up on brazil nuts, a pot of pineapple chunks, some oats, honey and some innocent smoothies as I can't wait til I get home to have something, anything!
The smoothie abates my hunger somewhat but it's not satisfying at all. You know when you get hungry when you're out and about and you can deal with it because "it's ok, I'll have some nice hearty beef stew and dumplings when I get home" and you know you'll be satisfied until breakfast in the morning but this hunger is awful because you know that whatever you eat isn't going to fill you up for long and the hunger cycle is going to continue.
I go to the opening show and take my brazil nuts with me to snack on but it's just not the same unless they're covered in chocolate.
Get home to bed just as hungry and miserable. Read Mazzas second diary entry, think she's starting to crack too. The hunger will get you in the end and when do these cravings stop!!!
Saturday, January 21, 2012
The happiest day of my life so far.
Sitting here feeling hungover, desperate for food but the cupboard is bare so I go on to a little site called just eat and discover to my eternal happiness that there is a place in southamptonshire that delivers roast dinners! I shit you not!
Well we had to try it didn't we and this is what turned up...
THE MOST AMAZING ROAST DINNER!!!!
You might guess that I am a little excited by this. I've been saying for years that someone should deliver good traditional home cooked food. I mean Chinese and Indian and pizza are fine but sometimes you just want a good old pie and chips or roast dinner. And now here it is.
And it was yummy, so good, decent sized portions and very reasonably priced and the food itself comes in awesome biodegradable containers. I think the great British takeaway is my new favourite place.
Unfortunately they only deliver to certain places in Southampton so you have to check their website to see if you can experience gastric heaven yourself!
I wonder if there are any more around England? Just in case. If anyone knows don't keep it to yourself!
Get it here!
http://thegreatbritishtakeaway.y4f.co/
Or call them, they are awesome!
tel:02380970700
Well we had to try it didn't we and this is what turned up...
THE MOST AMAZING ROAST DINNER!!!!
You might guess that I am a little excited by this. I've been saying for years that someone should deliver good traditional home cooked food. I mean Chinese and Indian and pizza are fine but sometimes you just want a good old pie and chips or roast dinner. And now here it is.
And it was yummy, so good, decent sized portions and very reasonably priced and the food itself comes in awesome biodegradable containers. I think the great British takeaway is my new favourite place.
Unfortunately they only deliver to certain places in Southampton so you have to check their website to see if you can experience gastric heaven yourself!
I wonder if there are any more around England? Just in case. If anyone knows don't keep it to yourself!
Get it here!
http://thegreatbritishtakeaway.y4f.co/
Or call them, they are awesome!
tel:02380970700
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