Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Writers block

I wrote this when I was about fifteen which is why it sounds really twee!


I want to write a poem
but I don't know where to start.
It's got to be something meaningful,
something straight from my heart.
It could be about the birds,
the way they nest in trees.
Or it could be about a summers day,
crowded and gleeful with bees,
humming in the air above,
going about their chores.
Or it could be about a lion
and the mighty way it roars.
It could be about nature in general,
the way mother earth spreads her wares,
or the way children play
with no tension, worries or cares.
It could be about myself
but that would be way too dull
everyone else does that anyway
so I don't think that I shall.
It could be about the moon
playing with the sea
shining big and bright and proud
in the sky for everyone to see.
It could be about the stars
outshone by the moon.
Or the ever impending daylight
that covers them too soon.
I think that this is enough
for someone with writers block
I think I've done quite well
and written quite a lot.

I fecking hate traffic wardens!!

I realise this is yet another rant but I believe people will be with me on this one.
Traffic wardens. What in the world posseses someone to go into this profession? I mean, the whole world hates traffic wardens. If I were talking to someone in a bar and they revealed that they were a traffic warden that would be it. I don't even think I would finish my pint. Just tip it over their head and get the hell out of there. It would definitely be a deal breaker for a prospective boyfriend. Checklist: Own teeth? Yup. Doesn't live with parents? Check. No past criminal convictions? Hmmm depends what they were but ok. Job? Traffic warden? Nope not even worth a sympathy throw down. Not even if they looked like Johnny Depp and that's saying something!
I just got a ticket whilst I was at a free CPD evening learning about how better to care for peoples pets and I get outside and have a fixed penelty notice stuck to my car. At nine o clock at night! Seriously! Do these people have nothing better to do? There were loads of spaces and it wasn't even as if I was parked in a disabled bay! Nine o clock at night and I get a parking ticket. Maybe if the world wasn't so anti traffic warden, they wouldn't stick these things on our cars as they would have friends, a girlfriend, a life of their own and parties to go to. As it is, because of the profession they have chosen, they have a lot of free time to go wandering the streets when they should be parked in front of the tv with their significant other and a bottle of wine.
Maybe we should start a hug a traffic warden campagne where one day a year we're all super nice to a traffic warden. We have to hug them, ask how their life is and pretend to be interested in their lonely, tv dinner for one, talking to their cat life. "Thankyou mr/mrs traffic warden for this spectacular waste of money you have just stuck on my car. I'm going to show you the love and affection you are missing from your sad pathetic little life so that you can see what you're missing out on for the rest of the year."
Then we send them on their way, pondering their chosen career path. It'll either make them so sad that they are missing out on the wonders of love that they hand their notice in the next day screaming "love me, love me, I need to be loved!" or they'll be so depressed that they kill themselves. Either way; less traffic wardens. Win.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Always ranting.

Today I've been nursing some really lovely animals, some very smoochy cats (until I tried to take out his IV line!) and a beautiful dog who is the ideal patient. I've had to inject him so many times but he's still as loving as ever.
People on the other hand......
Well, I'll start with the band I tried out for. Went to meet these guys a couple of weeks ago and sang some songs to see if they were interested in having me sing in their band. I thought it went quite well to be honest and truth be told I was more concerned with the actual audition. I thought that even if they say no, at least I would have tried which is all you can do really isn't it? I could always delude myself into thinking that it was because I wasn't right for the band! Nothing to do with my singing hahaha. But instead of saying "Ally, it just isn't going to work out, you're singing sounds to me like cats being strangled by a giggling hobo, we're going to keep looking" he (the band guy) decides to ignore me! I mean how rude is that?
At any other point in my life I might have got upset over this but after losing Wayne I've decided I'm not going to sweat the small stuff. This guy obviously needs to strap on a pair and say what he really thinks and is that really any concern of mine? Not really.
Another example is a girl I met when I first moved over here. It was my first saturday night in Jersey and I thought "Ok, I wouldn't usually sit in by myself on a saturday night so I'm not going to start now! Also, I'm not going to make any new friends or have any fun if I don't get out there" so I put on my best clobber which in hindsight was not a good idea as I've now discovered Jersey is not ready for new rock boots and dred falls but anyway, I met this girl and we started chatting and she asked for my phone number and suggested that we meet up for some karaoke.
"Awesome!" I think "Well that was easy"
So I text her as planned the following monday to go to karaoke and do you think I got a reply? Did I fu@k!
If they had been the only two isolated cases then I would have put it down to bad luck. You know, trust me to meet the only two jack asses on Jersey but no! This seems to be an affliction affecting most of the population of Jersey! I think that it's only a matter of time before everyone succumbs to this disease that must waste the fingers of your hands away so that texting or lifting anything heavier than Jodie kidds big toe is virtually impossible. It must also affect their typing skills as well. Maybe they lose the bones in their fingers so that any kind of organised movement is just impossible. Maybe I should send flowers? Or a get well card?




My dred falls and a very happy face. Slightly emo I feel. Sorry bout that.




My beautiful New Rocks! Yes I realise that my tights blend in with the carpet but it wasn't planned just a happy coincidence.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

A poem what I wrote

This is a poem that just popped into my head one day. It's not about anyone, the words just appeared so I wrote them down. I think it started off about the fierce love a mother must feel for a child and then morphs into a romantic love but hey, interpret it as you wish seeing as I don't have kids!

I want to write words like ribbons        
To wrap a bow around your heart,
I want to build a cage around you,
To keep you safe from harm.
I want to cut myself to pieces
To stop you feeling pain
I want to be your shelter
To keep you out the rain.
I want to be by your side
Every minute, hour and day
I want to carry the torch
To light each step you take.
I want to build huge fires
To keep you warm at night
and wrap my arms around you
to keep you in my sight.
I want to climb inside your skin
So your heart beats nearer mine
I want to dance cheek to cheek
until the end of time.
I want to lay forever with you
gazing up towards the stars
knowing whatever mistakes we made before
the future is all ours.